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Table skills
From where silverware should be placed to how it should be used, knowing your way around the place setting is important in manners and etiquette. As per Kathie B. Martin, APR, president of The Etiquette School of Birmingham: "Knowing how to properly hold -and use -a fork and knife not only gives a child a sense of accomplishment and independence, it also allows a parent to better enjoy the meal. The parents can also be assured that their child will impress any adults they eat with,". Martin also advises that it's important to know how to eat in a clean manner.
Chewing
Across the board, etiquette experts agree that one of the most important dinner table manners to teach is to chew with your mouth closed. Encourage your children to do so by modeling it yourself, and even showing them how. After all, no one wants to see what's in there.
Speaking (without food)
Another important element of proper table manners that etiquette experts recommend is to never speak with your mouth full. This goes hand-in-hand with chewing with your mouth closed. At best, it's distracting to speak to someone who has food in their mouth -- and it can also be hard to understand people with food in their mouth. At worst, it's very unappealing, to say the least.
Please and thank you
These two important phrases are the cornerstone of good manners, period, and extend to table manners. They show gratitude and appreciation instead of entitlement (and no one wants a child -- or an adult -- with an entitlement complex. It's a huge turnoff in life).
How to actually teach these skills?
Set Realistic Expectations
When teaching your child appropriate table manners, it's important not to set your child up for failure. In other words, set realistic expectations about how long your child can sit quietly at a restaurant.
Practice at Home
If your child is old enough to understand what to do in a restaurant, then practice at home first.
For example - play make-believe at dinner time and pretend you are at a restaurant. Let the kids order from the menu and wait for their dinner. Let them know this is a special event and good behavior is what is expected.
Remind Kids Before Entering Restaurant
Once you child gets the hang of things at home, take her out and remind her that when she is out in public, she is expected to sit still and act like big kids (being relatively quiet, remaining in their seat, etc.) before getting to the restaurant. If she's been prepped beforehand, then a reprimand for acting out won't be a surprise. Then if your child handles herself well, you can reward and praise her for a job well done.
Start With Family-Friendly Restaurants
Family-friendly restaurants are the perfect place to test out restaurant table manners, staff there is usually prepared for anything.
Create Distractions
Family-friendly restaurants are also more likely to provide paper place mats with pictures for coloring and a few crayons to help entertain kids. Such distractions can help provide an interesting and new thing for a kid who doesn't get such at home during meals, thus helping to pass time until the food arrives.
Have more tips? Feel free to share in the comments below!
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